I began creating again, but my spouse quickly shut that down. Another mistake in my artistic journey was made.

I was working in the industrial sector, doing hard labor. Since I always wanted to start my own business, I figured I could focus on something I love and know well. Isn’t it what we all seek—to enjoy our work and be our own boss? My goal was to become a great artist and have my paintings displayed in an art gallery.

My ex knew I loved art and wanted to be a well-known artist before we started dating, so why did she think it was childish and believe I couldn’t support a family through “drawing cartoons,” as she stated?

I decided to put my passion aside and focus on my family and steady income, especially with a baby on the way. My time for creating art to help our finances disappeared. Now, I would be made to realize that my belief I could succeed in art was naive, and I won’t bring it up again. I made the mistake of letting my spouse convince me that I couldn’t make money from my art to support our family.

We came from different parts of the world when we started dating, and I should have noticed the warning signs and walked away instead of saying I do. I wore jeans and a t-shirt, while she was all about Victoria’s Secret and Pier 1.

I’m still searching for my identity as an artist. A year or two later, I got seriously injured at work, needing emergency double back surgery in the first two years, with rods and screws replacing my discs.

I soon realized I could no longer work in hard labor. Having only this skill since I was 16, and now being in my early thirties, I had no other skills to rely on that wouldn’t risk injuring my back again. It felt like a blessing in disguise to finally explore my art journey as an artist, right?

The answer is simply WRONG.

I, as an artist, felt I wouldn’t be good enough for the woman I loved, who was having my first child and her second. She was well-known in her field at the local hospital in Ohio, which is still the only one left in the city. Being an artist seemed insignificant compared to her and her social circle.

Shortly after my back surgery, I received a blessing. God sent me some angels, helping me turn my art into a surprising career opportunity.

My identity would be clear, and I would finally see myself as an Artist. This title would be embraced by my spouse. I would be accepted by her family and friends, becoming good enough to be her husband in front of everyone.

Was this truly my identity, or was it meant to be hers for me to adopt?

Sincerely,

David L

Healingwithart